*Sharing the light…*

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Image by Di

“What do we live for, if not to make life less difficult for each other?” George Eliot

Hello and welcome,

After beginning my blog, it evolved rather quickly into a journey of how I arrived here and also became an examination on the subject of self-acceptance.

I sought to find new purpose, and it’s not exactly where I assumed it would be…

For years, I thought the only way to make a meaningful contribution to others would be in a one on one setting through holistic health. No matter how many courses I pursued, I wasn’t rushing out to begin a business in energy healing, incorporating the hands on type of approach…
Why not?…

I had no clue…

There was always something niggling at me. I knew I wanted to add value and have a purpose in some tangible way.

But how?

How could I add value through this new creative outlet of photography and words? These were not what I had traditionally thought I’d pursue in a million years, but now I understand…
I chose to stop fighting against what I expected from myself and became open to a new paradigm…

Anything that lights us up…
That little spark of excitement…
The thing that has us day dreaming about possibilities…
and imagining…just imagining…
If it makes us feel happy, if it brings out the best in us…
it’s adding value to the world…
The world thrives on people feeling connected to their light…
And like this candle’s light, radiate a warm glow to those around us…
In the hope they may also ignite their own beautiful light.

 

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Image by Di

 

It’s sometimes mentioned that self- acceptance and self-love imply narcissistic or selfish tendencies. I don’t believe that to be the case. If anything, once we begin to accept ourselves as we are, sharing our light isn’t about being showy, but more about being quietly confident to live a life of Love….

It has potential for us to seek out the goodness in others.

It may foster more outward- focused living, where we are in a position to reach out more readily, see without judgement, open our heart, become more compassionate, purely because we are more aligned with our values, living a life that’s true to ourselves…

One where we are not afraid to share our vulnerabilities.

Through blogging and photography, I’ve found a home for these two new passions that are my means of reaching out to this world…
I’m not at all saying this blog is faultless by any means, as I’m very much a novice, but what I can honestly say is that I’m absolutely loving creating meaning from constructing letters that become words, to sentences and finally a post, with the intention they may resonate positively for someone. Even one person…

So my wish is to hopefully bring you comfort, encouragement or value by this means.

For this post, one that I’m intentionally keeping short ( by my standards!), I’d love to share with you an interview I discovered recently.
Ideas we have instinctively known for thousands of years are just beginning to be validated by Scientific method, which I personally find very interesting.

This interview shares much about what I’ll call the ‘Art of self-acceptance’ and reasons why it’s important and healthy to begin fostering a happy working relationship with ourselves…it also includes a discussion on Mindfulness and stress. It is on YouTube but doesn’t require watching, as its audio only. I hope you enjoy it. The quote below is a snippet if the interview is not something that resonates for you… 

‘Self-acceptance genuinely impacts the brain and genuinely decreases your anxiety so that you can use your vulnerability for good…’ Dr Srini Pillay, Psychiatrist and Brain Researcher.

How self talk changes your brain by Srini Pillay

Thank you for reading, and I wish us all the very best on this journey as we walk each other, hand in hand, to the finish line…
The line where we say to ourselves.. ‘I accept myself.’

Much love,
Di ❤️

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Time for us all to bloom…

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Image by Di

“Loving ourselves through the process of owning our story is the bravest thing we’ll ever do.” Brené Brown

Hello and welcome to the good news…it’s now time to reveal the person that’s been there all along, that for some of us, shame and fear of vulnerability became The Way. I hope you have your celebratory cuppa to share with me as you read…

Firstly,
I’m never going to say I’m a done deal, but with time, I can see that a different way of thinking beckons.
I’m using the second person terminology but this is for me as much as it is for you…🌹

Ok…

now it’s time to be unashamedly you! Quirks and wobbly bits galore as only you can do. You’ll see some glimpses of a different, but not new, you, so please choose to love and accept them. It will feel strange to begin with when you start to live the life you have wanted to live, no longer feeling like hiding yourself.  I became a paradox, in a way… on one hand the urge to appear as if everything was flowing smoothly and not admitting to having any ‘issues’ of my own, whilst on the other hand, I’d happily tell you about my short comings, almost as if to apologise for them. I think being a young mum, I began a path to appearing like I was the perfect one and ‘no…my children can do no wrong’…
Begin today to be real and authentic, and don’t apologise for being who you are.’ Di

Radiate joy and excitement when you feel it, almost with childlike enthusiasm. It’s infectious, as are all emotions. Being ‘over-excited’ was always directed towards me as a criticism… no longer am I attempting to contain this part of me.
I have things now that ignite me like never before and I’m not going to hide what makes me feel this way any more…you have my blessing to also become excited and show your passion for what matters…it’s a GOOD thing!

Find a swing and go for your life on it, conjuring up happy memories when you’d sit for hours, only stopping when someone else wanted their turn….give yourself permission to be silly and have fun, once again loving sparkles, rainbows, glitter and bubbles, if they are your thing.

“You can’t get to courage without walking through vulnerability.” Brené Brown

 

A Manifesto part 1.

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Created by Di

It may take some time and patience to begin to see yourself in a new light…you may feel like an imposter or that it’s not really you speaking, wearing, doing or saying things that perhaps may at first feel ‘out of character’…I encourage you to push through. Keep following your dreams and owing the things you love. Hey, you may even discover new things that take your fancy…all because you chose to start on the journey of self acceptance. Before long…you’ll notice the change in yourself, perhaps others will too. Some may think ‘you have changed’ but in reality, you are only revealing the essence of you, the part of you that’s been waiting to show up all along.

Putting yourself out there, being seen, can seem very unfamiliar, but if you have a message, a new purpose, the power to change someone’s life for the better…welcome yourself to a new way. There may be times too, when you ask ‘who am I to be doing this?” Well, all I can say is, ‘who are you not to? Who are you not to live your truth?’…

Times I would normally berate myself now transform into laugh out loud moments…basically you will free yourself from the compulsion to appear perfect. I have a sticky note on my mirror in the bathroom that states…
‘Release the need to be perfect…’ It carried me through last year and is still there. After a lifetime of being hard on yourself, be gentle as you navigate your new existence.

And what freedom that is!
When we shine our true nature, it affords others the chance to do the same, so we are doing the world a favour by being unabashedly authentic…After all, you spend more time with yourself than anyone else…

Sometimes, people or events in your life will appear that have you question yourself again, and you’ll wonder how far you’ve really come: See them as perfectly timed serendipitous moments designed to keep you focused on where you are heading.
Like taking the worn down path across the dewy grass, it will take time to forge a new route, one that seems very unfamiliar, but with daily practise through affirmations, the manifestos below, and listening to inspiring speakers, the new path becomes easier to see.

I offer you these Manifestos and if they resonate for you, please feel free to use anything as your ‘sticky note’ on your bathroom mirror…

A Manifesto part 2.

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Created by Di

I’m including two links for TEDx talks by one of my favourite thought leaders, Qualitative researcher, Brené Brown, who has created a beautiful self-acceptance movement through the power of Vulnerability and relinquishing Shame.
These mean such a lot to me and I’m offering these to you now…with my highest intentions…

Above all, enjoy being you…be your biggest fan.

Thank you for reading,
Much love,
Di xx ❤️

Releasing the little person within.

“Look deep into nature and you will understand everything better”. Albert Einstein

Hello and welcome…let’s share another cuppa together this week 🦋

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Well, Autumn lends itself to much contemplation for me…

I had the opportunity of sitting in a beautiful country village nestled in the mountains, watching the golden or red leaves gently float towards the ground. As they released themselves from the tree, some would not make it all the way, but would become wedged on a branch… it was if it were not quite ready to complete its journey yet, but still hung on to the tree, as if for comfort, as if for fear of fully surrendering to its transformation.

I also wondered…
Does the tree decide it’s time to release something that doesn’t serve it any longer?
What is it about that particular instant when the leaf begins to retreat?

Or…
Do the leaves decide it’s their time to fall away from the tree…
Relinquishing to something that’s been its support and nourishment for so long?

After my last three huge posts, things were presented as if I had made great progress in accepting myself and moving forward, finally content in the knowledge that I am comfortable in my own skin…

That’s all very well to believe, until something seemingly benign pushed that big red button on my back…
It’s usually a passing comment said by someone who doesn’t know our sensitivity to that particular topic… how could they really, if we have tried to hide it or disown it…
And in the freedom of being myself, I am learning that I must also afford others the same benefit to say what they need to, remembering we are all at different stages of this journey of evolution.

Until that moment, I’d thought…’I’ve got this now! You go girl! You’ve learnt much and worked hard on yourself…’

It was a welcome gift in retrospect.

These are my beautiful new awakenings from moments like this….

🌹 You see, it enabled me to discover those things that still push my ‘big red button’, that were next in line to be healed.
🌹It taught me that there is still a little more work to be done in my acceptance of those things I was ashamed of… that there is some more love to be generated towards myself.
🌹I understood that everything and everyone is here to help me evolve, no matter how much discomfort is stirred within.
🌹That it’s ok to be stirred by something. Evolution isn’t a static thing but like a mountain where each step takes you to the top, building on each other to get you closer to where you’re headed.
🌹It taught me there are some well worn beliefs that also must become like the leaves from the tree…they have served their purpose, but for growth to occur, they need to be discarded.

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So what did I do to comfort myself when I was triggered?

✨Firstly, I sat with my feelings of sadness and disappointment. It was what it was, and denying it would only keep my truth even further from me.
✨I searched deeply to work out why it hurt so much.
✨I spent some more time alone in nature, where I feel she accepts me as I am.
✨I discovered I treated myself gently during times like this… I’d walk slower, drive slower ( oh dear! Those people behind me, I’m sorry!) It was like I was cradling myself towards healing.
✨I decided that progress had occurred, in that I wasn’t beating myself up for becoming upset over the triggers, congratulating myself on this shining breakthrough.
✨I decided I was proud of my traits and next time, I’ll be more able to make light of a situation and perhaps again laugh at them too.
✨A serendipitous conversation with a friend eventuated very recently. It provided the  opportunity to search for photo of myself when I was a little girl.

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The mere sight of this innocent little thing with her life ahead of her.. tears effortlessly rolled down my cheeks while I was looking at the image of myself… I imagined wrapping my arms around her saying ‘I love you, gorgeous girl. You are precious.’ I told her she was beautiful, had a kind heart, just wanted to be understood and I reassured her that I understood her and had done so all her life…’but those pesky outside opinions and hand-me-down beliefs somehow had you all confused and unsure of who you were or had to be’.

Last week, I remembered this little girl…
…and just nurtured her back to love, by love. ‘It’s safe now to show your hyper sensitivity, it’s safe now to say you’re a dreamer, it’s safe now to show that child-like sparkly excitement over things that you are passionate about…’

I found this a very powerful part of my journey to acceptance…and now, the more layers I peel back, the more I’m realising I haven’t changed that much at all. What was required of me was to find those things that mattered to that little girl and let them shine, let them be used as a force for good for others. And to be proud of who she has become.

“I am worthy of love and acceptance as I am.”

It’s said that the path to self-forgiveness and acceptance is releasing shame and guilt. I realised this piece is really about these, so it’s with my pleasure that I offer this as part of Debbie’s ForgivingFridays

May you also feel you can love that little person in you…
Tell yourself the words you wished you could have heard back then, especially if you are finding parts of yourself difficult to accept or if certain things repeatedly push your buttons.

I wish you well in your journey, and please remember, we are all in this together. As always, you are very welcome to contribute anything here that has perhaps been on your mind.

Thank you for reading,
much love from Di ❤️